Open Studio

Okay, I have to admit that not a lot has been going on in my studio, but I have been working outside my studio!  I ran into some problems with my wax, and realized I’m kind of sick of it at the moment, and needed a little tantrum, er, I mean break…..  so gardening it has been, for a few days.  Getting my hands dirty always seems to have an (ironically) cleansing effect on me.  A few days pulling weeds and planting things, and I’m usually ready to tackle other things again.  So I thought I’d share a few pictures of the ongoing miniature garden plot.  This is really just a theraputic garden for me.  We subscribe to a CSA (Blue House Farm) that delivers a beautiful, bountiful box of organic green vegetables 6 months out of the year.  So technically, this garden isn’t necessary.  But growing things just really does something for me.

I dug the weeds out another 4 or 5 feet, and added a bean teepee, and some poppies.

I also added some permanent plants- some thyme, sage, and Tarragon, to keep the Oregano company.

As for that pesky wax, I had a large batch of it turn a deep brownish yellow in my crock pot. This batch of wax was already a little more yellow than it normally is, but having it in the crock pot totally ruined it.  So let my experience serve as a cautionary tale:  Clear beeswax does not like to be reheated, and does not like to sit for hours in a crock pot!  It even started to smell bad- pungent and strong. I had to throw the whole thing out.  I contacted R&F and they told me to only heat as much wax as I will use in one heating.  And maybe my crock pot heats hotter than I thought.  It is very old and does not have a temp gauge on it.  Ah, well, live and learn, eh?

Has anyone else out there had this problem with their wax?  I’d love to hear about it, and what you did to manage it.  In the mean time, I think a good studio cleaning is in order, and another try at this batch of granulated  wax. Wish me luck!

Just a quick post to show a newly finished piece.  This is the 28″x28″ panel I’ve been working on.  It took some different turns than the other, small white pieces.  It had different needs and challenges that demanded different problem solving.  This picture looks blurry to me (though the original did not), but if it were sharper, you’d be able to see the texture of the opaque white paint that is on the surface.  I used a tiny brush, with small, dabbing strokes to produce the halos around the roses, and fill in others.  It was very slow, and I thought it might be a bit like working in fresco would be.  Painstaking.  I also experimented more with my white ink pen, and like the fine line drawing that can be achieved in the wax.  Again, very slow, but worth it.  This painting pushed me in some new directions, and I am enjoying discovering different ways of handling the wax, and making marks.  It is a mysterious and infuriating medium to work in…. one must keep her sense of humor and adventure intact!

Working large in beeswax is a different animal, altogether.  I’ve been working on this piece for days now, and I’m just amazed at how different the process is when I scale up.  I guess I thought it would be a lot like doubling or tripling a recipe- just add more of everything and get more cookies!- but it’s not. The largest I’ve worked before in wax has been 16 x 16 inches.  This baby is 28 x 28.  Almost four times the size, and more than four times the work.  It’s exponential, I think.  But what is curious is the way the techniques actually behave and work differently. 

   Take fusing for example.  I usually fuse with a heat gun, and occasionally a travel iron that I picked up at a yard sale.  Fusing with a heat gun on a large piece of encaustic is really different- the wax behaves differently, with the pooling becoming more apparent than on smaller pieces.  Also, the pitting that looks interesting on a small piece suddenly becomes overwhelming on a bigger surface.  So I’ve been adjusting my technique as I go, scraping with a razor blade in between fusings with the heat gun to smooth out the surface, and smoothing the excess pitting with the travel iron.  I’ve been also using my light that is mounted on a stand to lightly fuse thin layers.  It has a 150 watt bulb, and does a good job of warming the surface and fusing delicate areas.  Also, laying down layers of beeswax is more difficult, because the wax starts setting about 10 inches into the stroke.  I can’t make it all the way across the panel in one brushstroke!

    It is so much more challenging, but I am figuring out some things, and learning a lot.  I think that in order to be happy with this medium (encaustic), I have to be willing to embrace it’s limitations and abilities, and keep working with what it is, rather than trying to force it to be something it is not.  When I just go with what it is, the rewards are so great. It always forces me to think of painting in completely new ways.  I’m really liking the way this larger piece is coming out.  I’ve just tried to emphasize translucency, and let the medium speak for itself.

Have I mentioned that encaustic painting is addictive?

So is working so small.  It’s like bite size art.  

I am painting, painting, painting for….a show in August, at Enso Gallery, here in Half Moon Bay.  I’m very excited to have a local show.  I’ll be showing these encaustics, and some new nest paintings.  Enso is a little gem of a gallery here on the coast, and they are great about supporting local artists.  They also have a wonderful yoga studio there, where I take classes sometimes…..I’m so pleased that I’ll be hanging this work there.

At least for me it is.  I resisted this for a long time, though.  I think I was afraid that if I let it be too personal, it would not be taken seriously.  So I detached myself from it, instead focusing on experimental landscapes that felt safe.  I was a young woman, trying to be taken seriously (and trying to take myself seriously) while having babies and generally being overwhelmed.  I love a lot of the work that came out of that time period (my mid twenties to early thirties)….. it’s just that it didn’t have that much to do with what was actually going on in my life.  I was full time with kids, and all of the craziness and immediacy that ensues, and didn’t have time to be out photographing and sketching for afternoons, or to come back home and create the large landscapes that I longed to continue with.  Finally, as Julia Cameron would say, the well went dry.  My paintings felt empty and overworked….. the painter’s equivalent of writer’s block.  It was like chewing on cardboard.  

Then I stumbled on a book that tripped me out.  It was Spilling Open by Sabrina Ward Harrison.

 She’s written/painted a few books since then, but that first one is still my favorite.  It is artistically and visually stunning, but what really got me was how personal it is.  It just shot right through me.  This was new to me- the idea that good art could be personal and feminine, and raw,  and just plain tell the truth.  That I didn’t need to distance myself from my experience, and add several layers of hazy intellectualism, in order to make a painting.  It was a new concept, that when I come to the canvas, I am enough.

So then I started asking myself new questions… like if I could paint anything, what would I paint?  If I could use any medium I wanted, what would I use?  I know this sounds silly- like why in the world wouldn’t I be asking myself those questions before?  But I had not let myself think this way in a long time, and it was new.  It has really changed my painting.  And my attitude. Nowadays, I can’t wait to paint.  The resistance I used to feel (you know- that gut churning feeling that procrastination brings on) just isn’t there.

And so much work has flowed from those questions.  The dress series, to begin with, and the nests, and this blog. And I’m finding that if I let my life and desires lead me, the complexity of meaning is still there. Really, so much of desire is universal. And even a dogged kind of intellectualism tags along behind, offering explanations for the symbolism in my paintings.  I like that the explanations don’t come first, though.  The painting comes first. 

I started with dresses.  I think I’ll end with them, too…..

For more about my dress series visit my website.

Some new work…..

I’ve really been enjoying working in this small format (8 x 8 inches) in such an open ended subject area.  The only criteria for them is the dominant color must be white, and that the subject involves repetition.  I’ve been playing with different ways of layering the wax, and applying it.  I also discovered that paint pens do just fine layered in with the wax, and am experimenting with a fine point white paint pen.  I got it for journaling, but it’s opened up another world with the encaustic, being one more way to create precise lines and imagery.  Encaustic is difficult to control, and generally takes a lot of deep breathing and letting go from me, because, well, I can be a control freak like that.  But that is also what I love so much about this medium- it keeps me on my toes, keeps me loose and open to possibility as I work, and it is such a rapidly evolving medium right now, with artists finding new ways to work with it all the time.  Each piece is a wild card.  

Here is another piece I finished the other night- sorry this photo is not sharper.  It is difficult to see the texture here- one of it’s assets, I think. The embroidered circles are doing a lot for these nest paintings, adding some unusual texture and relief to the image.  This, by the way, is the nest I wrote about a couple of posts ago. This is also a small piece.  I have been warming up to this painting small business.  It used to be that any painting under 3×4 feet seemed like a waste of time, but there is something so satisfying about being able to finish a painting in a relatively short period of time, and then being able to hold it in my hands and look at it….. instead of having to stand back 8 feet just to see it properly.  The small pieces are more intimate that way.  

Well, I’m off to make more tea, go to a friend’s baby shower in San Francisco, and then come home and paint sets for the play.  And maybe embroider more paintings…….Whew!

Green tea is my new coffee.  At least for now…

My family and I have been a bit under the weather this week. I don’t know if anything could keep me off coffee (aka, “The Elixer of Life”) permanently, but I’ve managed to switch to green tea while I recuperate. It’s made for a few blurry days in the studio, but I’ve been getting out there anyway. I’ve made a little progress on the nests, but the big news is….

I’ve fired up the hot plate and have finally started painting in encaustic again. It feels like it’s been so long.  My table isn’t the right height yet, so I’ve been getting a sore back and neck, but it’s worth it.  Totally. I was really missing the smell of beeswax.  I’ve started a new body of work. These pieces are the 8″x8″ pieces of plywood that have been sitting in my studio for a few weeks. They have the look of tiles, and I want to hang them in groups. Here are the first few, I have 21 more to go…

I am, so far, very pleased with the way these are turning out.  I’ll have to write another post about the influences here, but for now, I need to get myself out there and paint some more!

We actually woke up to some sun this morning.  Not that it’s particularly warm, but still nice. A hint of spring.  I got some time in the studio last night, and here are the remains….. and some of the results.

The painting on the left is something I’m working on, and the two on the right are some of the first bird theme paintings I did, and decided that they needed to be recycled.  I whited most of them out, and they’ll become something new.  And speaking of something old becoming something new, here is the table I mentioned. The one destined to become the encaustic table.

I know, it totally needs work.  It’s been sitting out in the fog and rain for weeks, and the veneer is peeling, but I think with a little thought and care, it will work out perfectly. I need to build up the top so that it is taller, and top it off with some plywood. I can’t wait to get the hot wax going in the studio.  It won’t truly feel like it’s mine until it is saturated with the smell of beeswax!